ABOUT ME

Click the pic for a glimpse of hood life.

Click the pic for a glimpse of hood life.

Hi, my name is Sarah (under that helmet I’m hot).

I don’t know what brought you to this end of chaos, but I must warn you that I’m just a nerd living in the hood. There’s nothing fancy in the pantry.

I grew up loving Potted Meat because I was always starving and I didn’t care if it smelled like cat food because to me it was heaven (the one for poor people).

At the age of three, I could read, play chess and count to twenty-seven, though you may question this truth, there’s no way to prove otherwise. Sometimes I think I made it up just to feel better about being all fake gangsta.

I’m right-handed, yet completely accurate with my left when needed (I’m talking about bowling of course).

My biggest fear is becoming a hump back. Yes, you read that right. I said hump.

I’m five-foot-ten, so losing a few inches might not matter much, but I worry I won’t be able to sleep on my hump?  When I’m at the zoo I never see camels sleeping on their humps– do you?

So that’s me and if you enjoy my blog you can help me get out of this hood life by sharing it with a friend or at least your legal guardian.

I’m no Eminem, but watch out because I do own a dirty hoodie.

Fiercely Yours,

Comments
  1. My theory is that if there’s a grey area in which people neither love nor loathe you, it means you are boring. It’s an unproven theory, but it gets me through the night.

  2. I’ve nominated your blog for a Versatile Blogger Award, which means that I find it as amusing as hell. Thanks for keeping me entertained!

    Click back onto The Dissemination of Thought to find out what the award is all about.

  3. Sandi Ormsby says:

    I think you’re funny. Anyone one who is true to themselves and has a sense of humor is awesome. I was the complete “mediocre” kid. Middle of the road grades, middle of the road friends, clothes, popularity, looks…I was the person that could be utterly forgetable, except by my friends. They know me as always the person “with a story to tell.” My favorite phrase

    “hey, guys. Guess what happened to me today?” or “Hey, guess what I saw!”

    They were disappointed if I didn’t bring them a daily story. I never had to work for something to share. There’s just always an interesting “spin” on things to see. I guess that’s why I blog!

    I’ve signed up for your posts…feel free to sign up for my blog too…I might amuse you now and then! (of course, I’m not promising anything.)

    Sandi
    http://www.ahhsome.wordpress.com
    Lake Forest, CA

    • Thanks, I have always been considered the “interesting” or “unique” one of the bunch. I look forward to the possibility of being amused by you in the future. Welcome to 2012!

  4. HT Sundance says:

    You’re certainly an interesting one. Thanks for the like.

  5. nataliealner says:

    I love your writing style, simple, elegant and yet full of substance and imagery. You are very talented.

    Human beings suck at accepting “different”. You stayed true to yourself despite the difficult times and I respect and admire that. I know a lot of people (some former friends) that caved under pressure and tried to change themselves into something they were not. Then spent the next decade in misery trying to look away from the obvious.

    I look forward for more of your posts.

  6. This one B. says:

    I love this. I’m so glad I found your blog because you are not only hysterical, but a good writer. I’m excited to read more!

  7. I sincerely thank you for the like on my post “Bashful.” While reading your post I noticed some similarities. You said that at three you could read, play chess and count to twenty-seven. Well, at twenty-seven , I couldn’t read, I couldn’t play chess but I could count to three.. Well anyway I think I’ll be back, very funny stuff.

  8. natasiarose says:

    Cute hair. Short hair and a hump are my two biggest turn ons.

  9. Thumbs up for potted meat and the scars you earn for not giving up. 😀 Sincerely, New Follower

  10. I’m 5’10” as well – tall is awesome, enjoy it! There’s always hope, my hubby is 5’7″ on a good day and people bizarrely don’t notice the height difference (and no, I don’t have a hump lol) and our 4 year old thinks daddy is taller – classic!
    Keep up the writing, humour is hard, you pull it off.

  11. clownonfire says:

    What else was left to say after “My name is Sarah”, really?
    I was already a subscriber just there. Just like that.

  12. Ink Pastries says:

    Wow, I knew how to play chess at three, too, and I also can’t prove it (unless I can track down my friend, Susan Worley, whose father taught us how to play chess then). I also loved canned meat product, and still thrive on protein. I wanted to name my all girl band Mystery Meat, but found out it was taken already. I like how you connect sex and writing – I have been writing since I was a girl and find it’s more than cathartic: it’s the window into the Eternal Orgasm. Take care, and I look forward to reading you. Sheri

  13. Ok. So I know you probably have a million followers and awards, but your blog is my absolute favorite so I awarded you the Liebster. Come visit my site…fivesecondrules.com

    I love love love your blog!

  14. michellebloom says:

    you already have the versatile award, if you would like the inspirational award, i have nominated you for it. thank you for your humor and heart! http://bluelilystorm.wordpress.com/885-2/

  15. JKBradley says:

    Gonna dig in now.

  16. Meredith says:

    thanks for making me laugh with just your profile. I’m sure that’s not all you’re good for but it served its purpose for tonight. I’ll be back!

  17. johndwm says:

    I enjoyed this lots and lots and lots…and lots… You remind me… I hope you dont mind because you are both absolutely unique …of another blogger called NeverContrary from Louisiana. The thing you both do is be so real immediate honest and ascerbic without the bitterness – that its an absolute joy and very easy to read… and funny … but funny with a small ‘f’ – ie you are funny rather than doing funny! Thanks . I’m at http://johndwmacdonald.com Blesings – The Macdonald!

  18. I teach English to elementary school kids in Korea. When I want my kids to stop acting like wild monkeys I say “supercalafragalisticexpealadocious”. They all crack up and say whaaaaaaat teacher? Say it again. That’s how I felt when reading your blog:)

  19. it’s quite nice to meet you. where are you from? I dig the crazy photo hair picture on the sidebar. awesome. I wish I had that.

  20. Jennifer Murphy says:

    Thanks for stopping by my blog, you certainly have a fantastic blog going here! I look forward to reading more.

  21. I like potted meat too. Cut me in half and find an economy burger. your posts look good. Nice work.

  22. Jixi Fox says:

    you are tall…I am only 5’7…lol.

  23. wordcoaster says:

    Argyle? SO FIERCE. I should have known from your moniker.

  24. kittyb78 says:

    Yuck! I can’t stand the smell of potted meat.

    I was reading at the age of three as well. Haven’t stopped since either. I’m 5ft 4inches, lol. But I’m taller than my dad {A Marine} by a couple inches. XD

  25. Hello just stopped by to say I have nominated you you for the ‘A Lovely Blog Award’. I have enjoyed stopping by and reading your words – and thought I’d let the blogging world know they should also visit your pages for a good read! Part of being nominated is passing on the nomination to other people – visit my page here to see if you want to take part in this award: http://merlinspielen.com/2012/05/15/a-blogger-award/

  26. More laughs for me. The hunchback thing – you are awesome. Will follow your blog and look forward to it. I am writing in strange little fragments. So be it.

  27. gwen says:

    Thanks for your Like! I love what you’ve got going here 🙂

  28. John says:

    Good about page! Thanks for visiting.

  29. duffythewriter says:

    Thanks for stopping by my blog, gave me a chance to read yours!

  30. perca says:

    Sarah, our story not to different. No one like me, much of them hate me.
    I think I got dsylexia or something else, not capability to get communication with other people, and many else.
    Thanks Sarah, Its nice to see you..

  31. rehobothhouse says:

    Thanks for visiting my blog. Blessings for a prosperous new year.

  32. thank you so much for visiting my blog!

  33. Teeny Bikini says:

    Sarah, This intro is delightful – filled with charm, wit and self-deprecation. Thank you for sharing. Fiercely Yours is a great title as well. I’ve run out of compliments so it’s back to work for me 🙂 Cheers.

  34. Hi! Thank you so, so much for visiting my blog, as it has allowed me to find your amazing piece of work. I love this blog, you are extremely funny and, if people either love you or hate you, I instantly love. Keep up the awesomeness!
    Lorna x

  35. Franco Bolli says:

    I have nominated you for the Liebster Blog Award.
    More info on http://francobolli666.wordpress.com/2013/01/15/liebster-blog-award/

  36. I am absolutely loving your blog!

  37. What a great About page! I can see why your yearbook teacher thought you were so funny. This is great writing. I’m looking forward to following your blog.

    Also, I’m glad someone remembers the darkroom. I loved the darkroom in high school (and not just because I was goth). All teenagers should spend some time in utter darkness reeling undeveloped film from one canister to the next. It’s good for the soul, a little “memento mori” to go along with the pep rallies and tater tot lunches.

  38. Great about page. People can be so rude: If they asked you for something from the top shelf, it’s only right they give you something from the bottom one. It’s the law of the universe.

  39. I LOVE your resolutions!

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